Citigold banking going away for mere bourgeois

I’m at Shitty Citi because they were the ONLY bank to have online banking for Mac users back when I signed up for an account in 1995, when the only people using Macs were those of us working at Apple and our incredibly cool friends. Citi sent a disk with some weird software that would dial up a modem and allow me to do magic like pay my bills without writing a paper check, and I thought that was good fucking times.

So naturally, here I am, still with them, a hundred years later, and my business banking is with them, and Caroline’s banking is with them, and la di da. All that has allowed us to be Citigold, which I don’t particularly care about, except that a) it waives fees and b) it makes my Citi Prestige card $100/year cheaper.

Well, someone decided Gold should be for those with gold, because we’re getting downgraded to a new package called Citi Priority, by which I assume it means we are given priority when it comes to the next shafting of services. But for now it doesn’t seem too terrible.

I called them, and they said that as long as we’ve got $50K between all of our accounts (the business account being the big fish there), everything’s exactly the same, minus having a dedicated personal banker. Which is ok, because you know what I don’t need? A dedicated personal banker. In fact, they now will cover an unlimited number of non-Citi ATM fees, as opposed to only six per month previously, so that’s an improvement. [Update: it turns out the business account doesn’t count, but the banker who set it up indicated our fees should be waived on our personal checking.]

All this kicks in November 1, so I’m glad I got in with my Citi Prestige when i did. Hopefully the reduced cost was established at signup, and will persist after I’m no longer Citigold. If not, I’ll bitch and moan at them, and in any event I’ll be expecting they’ll be handing out retention bonuses like condoms at a pride parade when everyone calls to cancel their card next year after it no longer gets them into American Airlines lounges and decreases their FuckYou ThankYou points spending power.

If you’ve got Citigold, now might be the time to get a Citi Prestige card if its 4th hotel night free benefit appeals to you (since, after their recent benefit shaving, that’s the main thing going for it, but it remains a benefit without equal if you use it).

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